CD35 and counting

CD35 / 14DPO

Figured the wicked witch would be here by now. Was checking every 10 minutes over the weekend for her but she didn't show.

I haven't taken my temp for years now, but decided to take it on Saturday morning to check when AF would arrive.

• Saturday's temp was 36.80 .... quite low for me from memory so decided not to POAS. 
• Sunday's temp was 36.85 ..... ummed and arred about POAS and decided what the hell! BFN with IC :(
• Today's temp is 36.92 ...... was too scared to test and totally chickened out. 

I woke up feeling very hot, didn't sleep well last night, my lower back is so sore, my hips are achy and I'm quite bloated. My mood is OK actually, I normally get quite teary and irritable two days before AF arrives. Whilst I'm not surprised about yesterday's BFN, it still hurts like hell. I just want it to be my turn with no complications .... easy, breazy, healthy pregnancy please.

CD30 / 14DPO / 9DPT of ICSI #4

I had vowed not to POAS this week, however something got the better of me yesterday and I found an old IC HPT under the bathroom sink and decided to test. 

Low and behold, it was .....

BFN

Shock. Horror. How could that be? I have all the pregnancy symptoms. HAHAHA!! As a veteran of this IVF procedure, you'd think I'd remind myself daily that these symptoms are also AF.

I jumped in the shower and tried really hard not to cry. The rest of my day was a write off - I was miserable and didn't want to talk to anyone.

I was on the verge of a mini breakdown, especially after DH and BF screamed at me for testing so early. But I don't think it was early. 85% of women discover a BFP at 13DPO. Anyway, lesson learned and I won't be testing again - I intend to wait for my beta test on Friday. 

In the meantime, the symptoms continue:

• Sooooo tired
• AF cramps
• Sharp jabbing pain on the left side
• Slight bloating
• Sore boobs
• Insomnia
• Wake up hot
• Nausea in the morning - coffee is a struggle
• Blocked sinus

I'm telling myself today to have FAITH, have HOPE and to BELIEVE this can happen. I will see a BFP one day.